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March 27, 2006

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My husband and I are striving to set up our finances in such a way that, when we start having children, we will have no debt except our mortgage and one of us will be able to stay home full time. I've learned that if I share this goal with friends or folks at work, however, it is received coldly. I am immediately perceived as having an elitist attitude, and I am met with defensive comments of how they would never be able to afford to do that. It is frustrating that our society seems to encourage financial struggles as the normative situation and discourages efforts to rise above the norm.

While there are some couple that are forced to both work, in many instances it IS a choice. I am always blown away by the couple that has dual incomes and is talking about how they would love to stay at home but just simply can't afford it. They drive a Lexus and a Range Rover, have a huge house, take regular vacations, etc. Of course they can't afford it! For these people it is simply a choice. They have choosen to have these things and not truely make the sacrafice necessary.

My wife and I made the decision long ago she would stay home with the kids. We pass up on the expensive vacations every year for something affordable. We dont get cars very often and we have a very well thought out budget. It has not always been easy, but with a little hard work we live quite well now.

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