Here are two interesting pieces I recently ran across -- both involving money, couples, and sex.
In the first, Money Central asserts that the more money you have, the better sex you have. The summary:
The richer you are, apparently, the better sex you have. That's according to a recent survey of more than 600 high-net-worth individuals.
But, as the song says, money can't buy you love:
Yet, money doesn't instill a sense of fidelity: 53% of the wealthy men surveyed, and 73% of the wealthy women surveyed, say they have had extramarital affairs.
I'm not sure what to make of this. First of all, these people are far out on the bell curve financially -- they have an average net worth of $89 million and make more than $9 million per year -- so it's hard to say if money really makes them different sexually or they are just different to begin with, which helps them earn money and have (in their opinions) better sex. Second, from my personal experience I can't say that more money equals better sex. In fact, I could argue the opposite -- as long as you're not totally broke. Any thoughts out there from anyone on this issue?
The second article is from the Washington Post and says that couples fight more about money than anything else -- even sex. The details:
The latest comes from the online payment company PayPal. In its "Can't Buy Me Love" survey, the company found that money trumps sex and housecleaning as the No. 1 issue that couples fight about.
Personally, my wife and I don't fight about money or sex. And, for the most part, we don't fight about housecleaning (most of the housecleaning issues are us against the kids.) ;-)
The piece goes on and suggests a reason for these money troubles:
Over the years, I've received many letters and e-mails from couples who are struggling to manage their money together. Usually it's because they failed to have meaningful financial discussions before the nuptials. Many couples spend a year or more planning their wedding ceremony and reception but less than a few hours -- if that -- figuring out how to deal with their money differences.
So true. Most people are so "in love" that they don't even think about discussing money. Then they get married and she's a saver and he's a spender (or vice versa) and all sorts of trouble occurs.
The article also lists several fairly common occurrences that are also symptoms of a money problem between couples:
I've heard from married folk who refuse to divulge to their spouses their annual income. Others buy expensive items without consulting their mates. They hide bills. Or they argue over how to divide up the bills based on how much each one makes.
Anyone out there do any of these? How's it working for ya?
We keep all of our money together, discuss everything, and don't make major purchases without consulting the other person. For us, it just works better that way. I know their are other ways couples handle money, but this one has worked extremely well for us for 15 years.
So, what's the conclusion from these two articles? Is it that money and sex are linked? Maybe -- if you look at it from the angle that money influences relationships and how well a relationship is going can have a dramatic impact on sexual relations. Other than that, I think these two piece are simply looking for a way to attract attention (they got mine) -- and what better way than to write on money and sex? ;-)
I'm so glad my wife and I talked about money (and sex) before we got married. It can still be uncomfortable to talk about from time to time as we don't always see eye to eye on things. But it has certainly made the transition of being married much smoother!
Posted by: Rob | February 26, 2007 at 10:27 AM
What, no pictures?
Having been married for just over 6 months, neither issue has led to very many arguments in my household. We sorted out our money issues a year to a year and a half ago after she moved in with me and we began looking for a house. We knew that after we got married that we would only have one income for a few years, and wanted a place to live that we could afford without needing to worry. I handle all of our financial responsibilities, because (a) I actually have an interest in it, and (b) she is in her first year of law school and doesn't really have the spare time, especially since I am able to take care of everything for her. I still discuss with her how much we have coming in and going out each month so that she has an idea of what's going on, though. The few larger expenses that we have had to make so far we have talked about before hand, which seems to work out all right.
Posted by: Blaine Moore (First Time Homeowner) | February 26, 2007 at 01:56 PM
How do people "refuse to divulge to their spouses their annual income"?
Do they file separate tax returns?
Posted by: | January 19, 2008 at 01:44 PM
i m married 12 months
Posted by: neethimalai | July 10, 2008 at 10:06 AM
Though some may not think so, learning to patch up a relationship and keep it together is a skill that can be learned. I try to help others discover the keys.
Posted by: | April 15, 2009 at 10:05 AM