More on How to Save on Funerals

Some good comments on my post about saving money on funerals. I asked readers for some tips and here are some worth posting for all to see:

People DO shop around for funerals. The FTC requires that each funeral home provide a list of prices which (by law) must be given out when someone inquires about a service. If you have a particular funeral home in mind, they may match the pricing from another competitor in the area based upon the price list. Additionally, Costco provides a low cost alternative for caskets.

Really? Do people really shop around for funerals? Anyway, I LOVED the Costco tip here. I'm sure they can save us all some big bucks.

I recently buried my father and my family appointed me to make most of the decisions, mostly because I am the only one that reads sites like this one. Because my dad had terminal cancer, I was able to do some research and make some decisions in advance. The funeral director said it all when he told me "There's no such thing as a cheap funeral". I had told him that I didn't want to be cheap but my dad only had $5700 in life insurance. My parents had about $12,000 in the bank and lived on Social Security so I didn't want to spend much of that. I learned a lot about the funeral business but unfortunately some of it too late to save me money. First I was able to get a casket from a dealer for $650. Not the cheapest she had but pretty close to it. I checked the prices of two funeral homes in my parent's neighborhood, the cheaper one was the one I wanted to go to anyway so that worked out. Cost for one day visitation, church service and graveside service about $6,000. Then there was the $1,000 to open the grave (dad had bought the grave site in 1960). The grave marker was $2,000 (I think I could have saved money here but I did this after dad died and my rational money mind was not working).

My dad had a nice funeral and I felt like we truly honored him. I could have spent thousands more but that wouldn't have made any difference. He would still be gone and all we have left are memories.

Good tips from someone who's had to deal with a tough death in the family.

I sell life insurance, so I have to deal with this on a daily basis. If you are a member of a church (especially one with a graveyard), you don't even have to involve the funeral home except maybe to rent the hearse and for the embalming (if that's necessary with your state laws). The funeral home charges extra to set everything up, like going to a travel agent instead of buying your plane tickets yourself.

Hmmm -- another advantage of going to church, huh? ;-)

I have 8 years in the funeral business.

First, I believe part of estate planning is funeral planning. You can pre-pay (which is essentially a term policy) or pre-plan. Funeral providers are happy to help with either one.

Advantages of pre-planning:

• Time to shop around (do you rally want to take six weeks examining all option while Mother decomposes?).

• Time to take family wishes into consideration (do they want a body to view or a grave? will a memorial service suffice?).

• Communicates to the family what your wishes REALLY are (ever sit in a room with six people who knew EXACTLY what Mother wanted, but six completely different ideas are espoused? every try to get a group of people to reach the same decision? yes, it is as bad as a jury deliberation).

• Takes financial stress off of survivors...a pre-paid funeral is paid for at time of death.

A few other things to keep in mind:

• Most funeral service providers have policies about embalming a body that is put out for viewing. There are health and ascetic aspects to this (bodies break down quickly after death, especially at room temperature. more so if the deceased was old or ill).

• You can compare prices, but it is hard to compare services. The firms I have worked for go out of their way to help families. I have heard horror stories of providers that do the absolute least...cheaper and it shows in the service they provide.

• Keep in mind that things such as pauper's caskets are not attractive. Going cheap is smart. Going tacky could be upsetting to those who survive.

• A firm I used to work for took on the competition from store front casket shops. They matched prices on their caskets and jacked up the price of services. They also increased the price of cremation to make up the loss.

• Finally, donation to a medical school or science lab is the least expensive way to go. Check the terms, but generally they cover transportation up to 100 mile, cremation, and placement in an unmarked memorial garden.

After this, direct cremation and direct burial are the least expensive.

With the above mentioned, usually your local church or place of worship can host a memorial service and visitation.

Some good tips in here. Anyone have anything else to add?

Comments

[G. Jules]

It's also possible to shop around for a better deal on burial space, although as mentioned above, it's the sort of thing you want to do as a pre-planning arrangement. Shopping after the death of a loved one puts you at your most vulnerable, and there are cemetery operators who may take advantage of that.

For cemetery plots: You will probably get a better deal if you check out your local municipal cemetery rather than going to a corporate-owned garden-style cemetery. The non-corporate cemeteries don't spend money on advertising or upselling, so they tend to be less expensive.

If you're interested in a mausoleum/cremation niche, I've heard from people in the industry that spots near a water feature, double spaces, and interior glassed-in display spaces have the highest demand. If you're willing to take a lower-demand spot, you may get a much more attractive price.

Also: I have heard that it may be possible to negotiate prices. Worth a shot, at least.

If anyone's interested in getting more information about the death industry, I highly recommend Jessica Mitford's The American Way of Death. It originally came out in the 60s, but there's an updated edition -- and not much has changed from the 1960s anyway. It's a little scary.

[Jen]

My parents are members of, and I plan on joining, a cremation society. For a one time membership fee, they handle most of the details of a simple cremation, including picking up the body, the cremation, and the return in a simple container. Some, I believe, also include a basic memorial service.

The membership is for a lifetime and is transferable if you move out of the area (different areas have different societies but my understanding is they honor each other's obligations). This would not work for someone who wants an elaborate service or someone who doesn't want to be cremated, but other than that I believe it's one of the best deals out there. My local society is Cremation Society of the South (http://www.cssouth.com/).

[robert]

Years past, I took time to build my own casket.
every year or so I add carved panels of events to the outsides. Yes I may run out of room, however as it is being used as a bookcase, the old panels are used as book dividers.
The casket is a running point of interest and savings at our house.
As for cremation, my wife has some nice roses that will need fertalizers later.

[Bronco]

Great idea, Owen Meany!