The Top Ten Turnoffs About Networking

The following is adapted from Make Your Contacts Count: Networking Know-how for Business And Career Success by Anne Baber and Lynne Waymon (AMACOM Books, March 2007).

Do some of the expressions that people use when they are talking about networking make you cringe? Here is a list of the Top Ten Turnoffs complied by networking experts Anne Baber and Lynne Waymon:

1. Schmoozing: This word makes networking seem so slimy and insincere! Networking is about teaching your contacts to believe in your character and competence so they want to work with you, send business your way or hire you.

2. 30-Second Commercial: Sure you want to "sell yourself" to your contact, but this phrase implies too much of a hard sell and demeans the very important interaction that takes place when you answer, “What do you do?”

3. Pick Your Brains: It makes us think of vultures coming in for the kill. We wish people would say, "I'd like to get your thoughts about something."

4. Work a Room: So depersonalizing and one-sided, this phrase sounds as if you intend to work people over and take all you can. Instead, focus on listening and showing others what they can count on you for and what kinds of opportunities to send your way.

5. Information Interview: You don’t have to make specific appointments to gather valuable information. Using state-of-the-art networking skills, you can make networking a way of life – at professional meetings, backyard barbeques, and all kinds of professional and social venues.

6. Tricks of the Trade: Let's not imply anything that smacks of manipulation. There should be no "tricks" when you network; only up-front, clear offers to be helpful to each other.

7. Favor Bank: Doing things for others is the right thing; just so they'll "owe" you one is the wrong reason. Give without strings, without expectations of getting -- that's the way to create a network that works.

8. Power Lunch: Yes, invite a powerful contact to lunch, but don't call it that. It sounds too much as if you value people just for their positions.

9. Business Card Exchange: Exchanging cards without building trust is non-productive. When you leave a networking event with 20 or 30 cards, what do you do with them? Toss 'em into the trash! Instead, listen for reasons to exchange cards. Be alert for ways to move your relationship beyond the networking event. Broadcasting your business cards makes only "cardboard connections," not real connections.

10. Important People:  Don't you hate it when you are talking with someone and that person is looking over your shoulder trying to find someone better to talk with? Give your whole attention to the person you are with. Anyone can turn out to be a valuable contact!

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What are your networking turnoffs?

Comments

[Pop]

The people I know who are very good at it are about the most insincere, fake people you could meet.

[Aaron]

Now I understand why I'm no good at that stuff. I have only walked away from one networking event thinking well of all the people I met. I'd rather meet people with sincerity and discover their value.

[matt]

lol i know people like that to , wish i could be more like that sometimes

[Kathleen]

These are very good points! I hated networking and couldn't do it - until I stopped "networking" and had a good time just hanging out and being interested in people :)